After a long life, dutifully serving his parishioners, the elderly priest died. He found himself in Heaven, where he was warmly greeted by St. Peter. “Welcome,” St. Peter said, “You have lived a good life. Let me take you to your quarters, and then I’ll show you around Heaven.”
St. Peter took the man to a rather plain building, and escorted him to a small room. The room was humbly furnished, but was functional. The priest was a bit surprised, having expected Heaven to be a bit more extravagent, but he was happy to be there.
They then began their tour of Heaven, and it was absolutely beautiful. The priest felt silly for his initial resentment over his room.
Finally, they came upon an enormous mansion. A butler opened the door to the mansion and a man came out, dressed to the nines, and proceeded down a long walkway to the front gate, as servants rolled a red carpet before him. When he reached the gate, a chauffeured limousine pulled up, and the man got in. It drove off.
“Was that God,” the priest asked, stunned by the display.
“Oh heavens no,” replied St. Peter. “That was a Seattle injury lawyer.”
“I don’t want to seem ungrateful, but can you answer a question for me?” The priest continued, “I spent my entire life devoted to my parishioners, and teaching the gospel, and I have very humble quarters in Heaven. I just don’t understand what that lawyer did, which would merit such a beautiful mansion.”
“It isn’t what he did,” St. Peter replied. “You see, we have thousands upon thousands of priests up here. But he’s our first lawyer.”