Day: February 9, 2009

Computer Acronyms

Here are some computer acronyms you may not have come across before:

  • PCMCIA People Can’t Memorize Computer Industry Acronyms
  • ISDN It Still Does Nothing
  • APPLE Arrogance Produces Profit-Losing Entity
  • SCSI System Can’t See It
  • DOS Defective Operating System
  • BASIC Bill’s Attempt to Seize Industry Control
  • IBM I Blame Microsoft
  • ISCSI Internet Satellite Can’t See It
  • DEC Do Expect Cuts
  • CD-ROM Consumer Device, Rendered Obsolete in Months
  • OS/2 Obsolete Soon, Too.
  • WWW World Wide Wait
  • MACINTOSH Most Applications Crash; If Not, The Operating System Hangs
  • PENTIUM Produces Erroneous Numbers Through Incorrect Understanding of Mathematics
  • COBOL Completely Obsolete Business Oriented Language
  • AMIGA A Merely Insignificant Game Addiction
  • LISP Lots of Infuriating & Silly Parenthesis
  • MIPS Meaningless Indication of Processor Speed
  • WINDOWS Will Install Needless Data On Whole System
  • GIRO Garbage In Rubbish Out
  • MICROSOFT Most Intelligent Customers Realize Our Software’s Only (for)Fools (&) Teenagers.

Tenjooberrymuds

In order to continue getting-by in Canada (our home land), we all need to learn the NEW English language! Practice by reading the following conversation until you are able to understand the term ‘TENJOOBERRYMUDS’.

With a little patience, you’ll be able to fit right in.

The following is a telephone exchange between maybe you as a hotel guest and the room-service operator somewhere in Canada……

Room Service : ‘Morrin. Roon sirbees.’

Guest : ‘Sorry, I thought I dialed room-service.’

Room Service: ‘ Rye . Roon sirbees…morrin! Joowish to oddor sunteen???’

Guest: ‘Uh….. Yes, I’d like to order bacon and eggs.’

Room Service: ‘Ow July den?’

Guest: ‘….What??’

Room Service: ‘Ow July den?!?.. Pryed, boyud, poochd?’

Guest: ‘Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry.. Scrambled, please.’

Room Service: ‘Ow July dee baykem? Crease?’

Guest: ‘Crisp will be fine.’

Room Service: ‘Hokay. An Sahn toes?’

Guest: ‘What?’

Room Service: ‘An toes. July Sahn toes?’

Guest: ‘I… Don’t think so.’

RoomService: ‘No? Judo wan sahn toes???’

Guest: ‘I feel really bad about this, but I don’t know what ‘judo wan sahn toes’ means.’

RoomService: ‘Toes! Toes!…Why Joo don Ju an toes? Ow bow Anglish moppin we bodder?’

Guest: ‘Oh, English muffin!!! I’ve got it! You were saying ‘toast’… Fine…Yes, an English muffin will be fine.’

RoomService: ‘We bodder?’

Guest: ‘No, just put the bodder on the side.’

RoomService: ‘Wad?!?’

Guest: ‘I mean butter…. Just put the butter on the side.’

RoomService: ‘Copy?’

Guest: ‘Excuse me?’

RoomService: ‘Copy…tea…meel?’

Guest: ‘Yes. Coffee, please… And that’s everything.’

RoomService: ‘One Minnie. Scramah egg, crease baykem, Anglish moppin, we bodder on sigh and copy … Rye ??’

Guest: ‘Whatever you say.’

Room Service: ‘Tenjooberrymuds.’

Guest: ‘You’re welcome’

Remember I said ‘By the time you read through this YOU WILL UNDERSTAND ‘TENJOOBERRYMUDS’ ‘…..and you do, don’t you!