The Joke Shop

At dinner one evening when the husband reached across the table, took his wife's hand in his and said, "Martha, soon we will be married 50 years, and there's something I have to know. In all of these 50 years, have you ever been unfaithful...

A state adopts strict new insurance self study CE (Continuing Education) requirements for its agents. The tests they now require are very difficult, can take no more than an hour to complete, and must be taken at a certified testing center. On the first day of...

I don't know why I was just sacked from my job with the Samaritans They wouldn’t talk to me about it. A guy phoned and said, I'm Abdul Mohammed and I’m going to kill myself. I’m lying on the railway track now waiting for the train to come. All I...

The newly divorced woman had never had to be the handyman around the house before, and quickly discovered she was lacking most of the proper tools to do the odd jobs needed. She made a trip to the local hardware store and quickly learned that...

A Priest, a Doctor, a rich Businessman and a Scotsman were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers in front of them. The Doctor shouted to them, "I've never seen such poor golf!" The Scotsman chimed in, "Och aye! We ha' been waitin' for nigh on...

User's new notebook PC has a wireless network card. He loves it - for a day or so, until the battery goes dead. "Did you plug it into a power outlet to charge it?" asks systems administrator. "No," says sales guy impatiently. "It's wireless, why...

As the coffin was being lowered into the ground at a Traffic Warden’s funeral, a voice from inside  screams: “I’m not dead, I’m not dead. Let me out!” The Vicar smiles, leans forward sucking air through his teeth and mutters: “Too f**king late pal, I’ve already done the paperwork”...

A woman in a hot air balloon realizes she is lost. She lowers her altitude and spots a man fishing from a boat below. She shouts to him, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't...

A guy goes to a female dentist to have a tooth extracted. She pulls out a numbing needle to give the man a shot. "No way!  No needles. I hate needles" the patient said. The dentist starts to hook up the nitrous oxide and the...

An Italian parks his brand new BMW in front of the office, just down the street from Casa Napoli, to show it off to his bros. As he’s getting out of the car, a truck comes speeding along close to the curb and takes off...