Day: February 18, 2008

Charlie was fixing a door and found that he needed a new hinge, so he sent his wife, Mary, to Home Depot. At Home Depot, Mary saw a beautiful bathroom Hansgrohe faucet while she was waiting for Walt, the manager, to finish waiting on a customer.

When Walt was finished, Mary asked, “How much for that faucet?”

Walt replied, “That’s pewter and it costs $300.”

“My goodness that sure is a lot of money!” Mary exclaimed. Then she proceeded to describe the hinge that Charlie had sent her to buy, and Walt went to the back room to find it.

From the back room Walt yelled, “Mary, you wanna screw for that hinge?”

“No, but I will for the faucet.”

.. and this is why you can’t send a woman to Home Depot.

Q. How many stitchers does it take to change a light bulb?
A. One, but it takes her several hours because she keeps wanting to do “just one more.”

Q. How many stitchers does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Two. One to get a 250-watt replacement bulb because the area could use more light, and one to replace the existing fixture with a directional one.

Q. How many stitchers does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Two, so they can discuss which color bulb would look better against the ceiling.

Q. How many stitchers does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Five. One to change the light bulb, and four to form a round-robin because the cover is too plain and would look great with a stitched design on it.

Q. How many stitchers does it take to change a light bulb?
A. None. He was using his Dazor magnifier lamp and didn’t even notice that the bulb in the ceiling had burned out.