Tag: Printer

What’s wrong with the printer?

I had been doing Tech Support for Hewlett-Packard’s DeskJet division for about a month when I had a customer call with a problem I just couldn’t solve. She could not print yellow. All the other colors would print fine, which truly baffled me because the only true colors are cyan, magenta, and yellow.

For instance, green is a combination of cyan and yellow, but green printed fine. Every color of the rainbow printed fine except for yellow. I had the customer change color ink cartridges. I had the customer delete and reinstall the drivers. Nothing worked. I asked my coworkers for help; they offered no new ideas.

After over two hours of troubleshooting, I was about to tell the customer to send the printer in to us for repair when she asked quietly, “Should I try printing on a piece of white paper instead of this yellow paper?”

Top 10 things to do with a broken printer

  • Put it in a director’s office. They’ll never know it doesn’t work.
  • Coerce it with a baseball bat.
  • Sell tickets and let others coerce it with a baseball bat.
  • Tell your boss someone put in ink cartridges full of invisible ink.
  • Pull the laser part out and try to blast Klingons.
  • Give it to your cousin who wants to open up a business card printing business
  • See if it floats in the fountain in front of the building.
  • Take it to the gun range for target practice.
  • See if it bounces when you throw it off the roof.
  • Leave it in the backseat of an unlocked car and track how long before it’s stolen.
  • Paint it gold and call it a sales award.

Printer problems

I had been doing Tech Support for the brother printers division for about a month when I had a customer call with a problem I just couldn’t solve. She could not print yellow. All the other colors would print fine, which truly baffled me because the only true colors are cyan, magenta, and yellow.

For instance, green is a combination of cyan and yellow, but green printed fine. Every color of the rainbow printed fine except for yellow. I had the customer change ink cartridges. I had the customer delete and reinstall the drivers. Nothing worked. I asked my coworkers for help; they offered no new ideas.

After over two hours of troubleshooting, I was about to tell the customer to send the printer in to us for repair when she asked quietly, “Should I try printing on a piece of white paper instead of this yellow paper?”

Some printer jokes

Check out these printer jokes:

  • You have just received your new printer and the box looks damaged with a nice expensive printer inside. All looks hopeless throw out the box it will likely not work.
  • What will my printer warranty cover? Your mouse pad
  • When the office printer color started to look a little off the manager called the local repair shop. To the manager’s surprise the clerk said that it would cost $50 to get the color printing sorted but that he might try reading the manual and doing it himself.
  • The manager replied in astonishment “does your boss know that you discourage business that way?”
  • “Yes”, replied the clerk. It was his idea. We make more on repairs than cleanings if the owner tries to do it himself first.
  • A woman called tech support and said her computer couldn’t find the printer.
  • The tech asked “are you working under windows?”
  • The woman replied “no I’m near the door but the guy in the next cubical is working under a window and his printer works fine.”
  • The printer is comprised of three main parts; the case, the jammed paper tray and the blinking red light.
  • When the printer still will not work after 20 tries; try sending the print job to all 100 printers in the office. One of them is bound to work.

Does that remind you of a printer you’ve used?