Guitar Jokes

Q: How many guitar players does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: 5 – one to hold it in place and 4 to drink beer until the room spins

Q. What do you call a bass player who just broke up with his girlfriend?
A. Homeless.

Q. What does it mean when a guitar player drools out of both sides of his mouth?
A. The stage is level.

Q: What is perfect pitch?
A: When guitar doesn’t hit the side of the dumpster.

Q: What do you call two guitarists playing in unison?
A: Counterpoint.

Q: How do you get a guitar player to play softer?
A: Give him a sheet of music.

Q: How many guitarists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Twenty. One to change the bulb and nineteen to say, “Not bad, but I could’ve done better”.

Q: What does a guitarist say when he gets to his gig?
A: Would you like fries with that?

Q: How do you get 2 electric guitar players to play in perfect unison ?
A: Shoot one of them.

Q: Did you hear about the heavy metal player who locked his keys in the car together with his best es 335?
A: He had to break the window to let the drummer out!

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