Zebra to lion: Let’s switch roles for a while. Lion: Sure, I’m game
Month: June 2009
Q. What do you call a cow with…
Q. What do you call a cow with no legs? A. Ground beef
Two lions strolling along Blac…
Two lions strolling along Blackpool beach, one turns to the other and says: There aren’t many people around today are there?
Two lions strolling along Blac…
Two lions strolling along Blackpool beach, one turns to the other and says: There aren’t many people around today are there?
You know when you’re getting o…
You know when you’re getting old when your wife gives up sex for Lent, and you don’t find out till Xmas
You know when you’re getting o…
You know when you’re getting old when your wife gives up sex for Lent, and you don’t find out till Xmas
Grocery Shopping
A man observed a woman in the grocery store with a three year old girl in her basket. As they passed the cookie section, the child asked for cookies and her mother told her “no.” The little girl immediately began to whine and fuss, and the mother said quietly, “Now Ellen, we just have half of the aisles left to go through; don’t be upset. It won’t be long.”
He passed the Mother again in the candy aisle. Of course, the little girl began to shout for candy. When she was told she couldn’t have any, she began to cry. The mother said, “There, there, Ellen, don’t cry. Only two more aisles to go, and then we’ll be checking out.”
The man again happened to be behind the pair at the check-out, where, amidst the beeps of the barcode scanner, the little girl immediately began to clamour for gum and burst into a terrible tantrum upon discovering there would be no gum purchased today. The mother patiently said, “Ellen, we’ll be through this check out stand in five minutes, and then you can go home and have a nice nap.”
The man followed them out to the parking lot and stopped the woman to compliment her. “I couldn’t help noticing how patient you were with little Ellen…”
The mother broke in, “My little girl’s name is Tammy… I’m Ellen.”
Q. What do you call a woman wh…
Q. What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is at night? A. A widow
You know it’s going to be a ba…
You know it’s going to be a bad day when the Samaritans put you on hold …
You can tell it’s going to be …
You can tell it’s going to be a bad day, when you find the Yellow Pages open at “Hit-men”