Day: December 16, 2008

Some quotes

Here are some quotes I came across in my surf around the Web

  • Ask not for whom the bell tolls, let the machine get it.
  • Procrastination means never having to say you’re sorry.
  • Being politically correct means always having to say you’re sorry.
  • On the other hand, the early worm gets eaten.
  • Virginity is like a balloon, one prick and it’s gone.
  • Other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, how did you like the show?
  • Trust in God, but lock your car.
  • Given a conflict, Murphy’s law supercedes Newton’s.
  • There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved through a suitable application of high explosive
  • I’m desperately trying to figure out why kamikaze pilots wore helmets.
  • I got food poisoning today. I don’t know when I’ll use it.
  • I took some baby shower gifts once. It left my skin baby soft.
  • A peanut saved is a peanut earned. A peanut shaved is a sterile man.
  • “Never eat more than you can lift!” — Miss Piggy

Some good ones eh?

Comrade Rudolph knows best

English Embankment in Saint Petersburg.
Image via Wikipedia

A Russian couple were walking down the street in St. Petersburg the other night, when the man felt a drop hit his nose. ‘I think it’s raining,’ he said to his wife.

‘No, that felt more like snow to me,’ she replied.

‘No, I’m sure it was just rain’ he said.

Well, as these things go, they were about to have an almighty argument about whether it was raining or snowing. Just then they saw a Communist party official walking toward them. ‘Let’s not fight about it,’ the man said, ‘let’s ask Comrade Rudolph whether it’s officially raining or snowing.’

As the official approached, the man said, ‘Tell us, Comrade Rudolph, is it officially raining or snowing?’

‘It’s raining, of course,’ he answered and walked on.

But the woman insisted: ‘I know that felt like snow!’

To which the man quietly replied: ‘Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear!’