Tag: Mother

Things Mom would never say

  • “How on earth can you see the TV sitting so far back?”
  • “Yeah, I used to skip school a lot, too”
  • “Just leave all the lights on … it makes the house look more cheery”
  • “Let me smell that shirt — Yeah, it’s good for another week”
  • “Go ahead and keep that stray dog, honey. I’ll be glad to feed and walk him every day”
  • Don’t worry about Mother’s Day. Who needs a unique mothers day gift anyway!
  • “Well, if Rahul‘s mamma says it’s OK, that’s good enough for me.”
  • “The curfew is just a general time to shoot for. It’s not like I’m running a prison around here.”
  • “I don’t have a tissue with me … just use your sleeve”
  • “Don’t bother wearing a jacket – the wind-chill is bound to improve”

Where jewellery comes from

One afternoon a little girl returned home from school and announced that her friend had told her where babies come from.

Amused, her mother replied: “Really sweetie, why don’t you tell me all about it?”

The little girl explained, “Well…Okay…the Mommy and Daddy take off all of their clothes, and the Daddy’s thing sort of stands up, and then the Mommy puts it in her mouth, and then it sort of explodes, and that’s how you get babies.”

Her Mom shook her head, leaned over to meet her eye to eye and said, “Oh honey, that’s sweet, but that’s not how you get babies. That’s how you get jewellery.”

(Pity mens jewelry doesn’t come the same way)